We live in uncertain times. What was familiar has now been elusive to us. The fear of the unknown makes us and people around us behave erratically. The stories we hear from the news weigh us down and further push away what we once known as normal. It hits us closer to home as well. We have lost loved ones to cancer and Covid – both plagues of the 21st century. We know of close family members and friends currently fighting these diseases. We see people struggling financially with the loss of jobs and sources of income. We are lost for words on how to comfort them. We don’t have the answers. All we can do is be there, be present, be always willing to help in any way we can.
Each of us are never immune to pain, heartaches, sadness, sickness and eventually death. This is part of being in this broken world. While we are in the midst of trials, it can push us to extreme darkness. We have the tendency to stay in darkness, our own bubble and shut the world around us. We want to deal with it on our own. However, during that journey of self-driving our life, it just sinks us deeper and deeper into darkness. How about trusting Jesus? How about choosing to believe and surrender to a Higher Power? How about putting our hope to Someone that will never let go of us? I can only share my personal experience when I made this decision. My life has never been the same.
I surrendered my life to Jesus when I was 12 years old. At first, it was out of fear of hell and being left behind. I clung to His promise of eternity in heaven. As I journey on in my newfound faith and read the Bible, His Word, I get to know Jesus more and that He is not just a God indifferent to me, but He is personally involved in my life. Verses such as in Luke 12:6-8 bring so much comfort and this is just one of many more demonstrations of His great love in the Bible.
“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. I tell you, everyone who confesses Me before men, the Son of Man will also confess him before the angels of God.”
When I lost my mother to a massive stroke in 1999, the pain has been unbearable. Even to this day, when I think of her, I tear up. However, I am comforted with the thought that she is in heaven and soon we will be re-united as she also made the same decision as I did of having Jesus in her life. I learned that I could have beautiful conversations with my Lord. During this dark period of my life, He allowed me to focus on what I have instead of what I don’t have. I have my father alive and well. I have my brother with extended family of sister-in-law, niece, and nephew. There is plenty of love around me. He enabled me to continue fulfilling the dreams my mother and I had when she was alive.
Another trial I faced was when I was diagnosed with Atrial Septal Defect (ASD) and that it worsened through the years until I needed open heart surgery. Along with ASD, subset of diseases e.g., hyperthyroidism and endometriosis surfaced. I chose to believe that He will provide for me and eventually heal me. He did in the most unexpected ways.
Jesus has been there throughout all transitions in my life, and I could not have survived these, if not for His guidance and hand of providence. There was the transition from being sheltered at home up to high school then living on my own in university residence, miles away from home. There was the transition from finishing up my studies to working on my own. Another was the transition from living in the Philippines, to living in a completely new country. Throughout my journey, the times when I let go of Jesus, driving my own life instead, were the lowest moments of my life. This knowledge will stay with me as I further face a tomorrow full of unknowns. I have resolved to never let go of Jesus’ hand and firmly grip it even more in times of trials.
I can’t fully explain my encounter with Jesus, but it has transformed me to the core. I have a long way to go and a lot of unknowns along the way. The thought of putting my faith in Someone who has been there from the beginning of time and fully knows what the end will be, brings me tremendous peace. The knowledge of having a personal relationship with the Creator of all, the King of kings, the Lord of lords, make me shudder and fear Him more. What’s even more incomprehensible is that this Mighty and Powerful God, cares for me intimately and even knows the number of hairs in my head. I can face whatever challenges ahead because I have a powerful shield before me! Even at the point of death, I know where I will be going and that I will spend eternity with Jesus where there will be no more pain and sorrow. My heart and spirit are strengthened with this wonderful truth.
I am a work in progress, and I am grateful to Him that He does not give up on me. He alone can spur the fruit of the Holy Spirit in my life: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Just reading these virtues, will never be achieved on my own. Jesus alone can enable me to let these reign in my life. I pray that you encounter Jesus too and allow Him to take control of Your life. I assure you; your life will never be the same again.
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