Regret is a powerful emotion. You and I have gone through it or may even be in the middle of it. It can leave us in a dark place for a long time if we allow it. It can prevent us from experiencing a happy life. The broken relationships caused by the wrong words spoken, the state of not being able to reconcile with someone who already passed, the betrayal of a friend’s trust, the consequences of poor decisions, the shame and guilt that blocks one from moving forward… These are among the outcomes of regret. There is that constant re-plotting of scenarios in the mind … if only I have not said it, if only I have not done it, if only I have waited, if only …
Last December, I watched a movie from Netflix called “Last Christmas”. It featured the leading character who has lost faith in her life and made one wrong decision after another. She was not going anywhere with her ambition of becoming a singer. She bounces off from one job to another. She was forced to move into her parents’ place because she’s broke. She has constant bickering with her mom and sister. She pushed everyone away and nothing seem to be working out for her. The sad part was she has so much potential and brightness in her prior to this major incident. Finally, she met a guy who slowly restored her faith in her life. Slowly, she learned to appreciate what she has and took small steps to peace and reconciliation with herself and others around her. I will not give away the ending (in case you’re going to watch it) but a bittersweet twist in the end. Be ready with your tissue box and keep it within reach.
Though always easier in fiction or movies, there is still a lesson that can be taken away from this movie. It entails tremendous amount of humility and courage to admit that one is at fault. However, it is only through this awareness and acceptance that one can move towards the right path. It also involves a person who truly cares that can give the will to change for the better. Finally, steps towards the right way does not happen overnight. It can be overwhelming especially if we focus on the extent of the damage done. We cannot repair everything at once. It takes one wise and correct step after another towards restoration.
Letting go of the past is most essential to moving forward but can be very hard to do. What has been said and done cannot be retracted. The good thing is there is always a new day, a chance to rewrite one's story. One can learn from the mistakes of the past and seize the opportunity of what can be restored today. The past failures aid us to think more carefully and to act wisely. The sting of hurt and pain, we surely want to avoid. It helps to reach out to a trusted friend/family member. Confiding in someone not only makes sense the thoughts/emotions one is going through, it also eases the burden and provides an avenue for a wise counsel/advise.
We are on the second month of this new year. May we not wallow in the “if onlys” but focus on the fresh start that each day provides. Above all, we can rely on Someone who’s always rooting for us to make the right choices and make the most of our lives. He has the power to forgive our past and grant us the grace to living a life without regret.
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. – Lamentations 3:22-23
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